Allons-y, Alonso!



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sexstiel:

this is literally the best video on the internet

(Source: lemidovato, via spoken-not-written)

stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

stripesdontmakeyoustraight:

If you ever think you did something embarrassing just remember that I had a really hot waiter one time and i was gonna order double pepperoni pizza but I looked him dead in the eye and accidentally asked for double penetration pizza in front of my whole family

Stop reblogging my failure

(via spoken-not-written)

god:

youngvlcanoes:

god ur annoying

excuse me?

(via spoken-not-written)

elimin8theimpossible:

cricsyxo:

divinedorothy:

egotastical:

divinedorothy:

bisexual people aren’t more likely to cheat in relationships but we are more likely to cheat at cards, while lesbians are most likely to cheat at jenga, and genderqueer people often cheat at mario kart

how the fuck do you cheat at jenga

ask a lesbian

image

this is never not funny

(via thewarlockhasthetardis)

dolevvhip:

How is Kim truly my friend in this game? Making me pay to take the buses and planes everywhere, I’m shaking trees and touching pigeons for some extra $$, only contacts me to promote damn ““‘Kardash”“” when I got my own store to take care of but never want to waste my energy in??? She is so fake at least Willow Pape is upfront and REAL smh

(via strocka)

humansofnewyork:

"My family made me come. But I hate it. I can’t get a job because I have a lot of accent. I was an assistant manager at a big jewelry store in the Dominican Republic, now I clean tables. We had a big house there. Now we live in a small apartment. If I was home right now, I’d be in a very nice restaurant, on the beach, laughing with my friends. Not sitting alone on a bench, trying to learn English. There I was a princess. Here I am an immigrant. A servant."

humansofnewyork:

"My family made me come. But I hate it. I can’t get a job because I have a lot of accent. I was an assistant manager at a big jewelry store in the Dominican Republic, now I clean tables. We had a big house there. Now we live in a small apartment. If I was home right now, I’d be in a very nice restaurant, on the beach, laughing with my friends. Not sitting alone on a bench, trying to learn English. There I was a princess. Here I am an immigrant. A servant."

Kit Harington for Jimmy Choo

(Source: jacktfrost, via daryldixon)

pother:

I control your entire country, kids

pother:

I control your entire country, kids

(Source: marvobow, via garbashians)

highwatr:

Le Noyé by highwatr.

Please, do not remove credit ; it costs you nothing and helps me a lot.

highwatr:

Le Noyé by highwatr.

Please, do not remove credit ; it costs you nothing and helps me a lot.

(via highwatr)

virginsplayground:

sad-butsassy:

shinnomew:

my-littletony:

vixen7:

I’m crying.

ITS BACK

“You’re the worst friend ever” in a monotone voice
I’m very happy

"I will rip your fucking throat out"

I TRIED TO NOT REBLOG BUT THEN I COULDNT

(Source: missinglinc, via timeywimey-superlock-loki)

greencrook:

greencrook:

greencrook:

There’s a very drunk man down my street who has been flirting with a tree for twenty minutes now.  

He’s on his knees now. I think he’s proposing. 

Drunk man currently walking away from the tree, shouting “YOU’RE ALL THE SAME”. 

(via supernatural-explosion)

aconsultingwarlock:

itsajensenthing:

starlit-notes:

I would like to thank my arms, for always being by side. My legs, for always supporting me, and my fingers…because I can always count on them.

this will be my speech when i win an oscar

Don’t forget the hips, for not lying. 

(Source: ohrendelle, via supernatural-explosion)

You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That’s where I will always love you. That’s where I’ll be waiting. Peter Pan  (via karengillan)

(Source: wordsthat-speak, via claryherondales)